Feeling Safe To Feel

I had a rageful temper in my pre-teens. It was frightening. 
Until around 14 years old when I consciously decided to turn it off. 
I don’t remember the chain of events that led me to the conclusion, but I remember deciding never to be angry again. I decided it wasn’t a good emotion and I wasn’t going to feel it any more. 
And I did a masterful job.
I became such an expert at morphing my anger into any other emotion that I sent stopped being able to even register anger.
I would rationalize my way to compassion in a nano second. 
Or I would turn the anger in on myself and go to sadness or shame. 
Or I would mine straight past the anger looking for the emotion beneath it. Usually fear or insecurity. 
I know exactly how to process all these other emotions. 
Maybe that sounds drastic, but if you look around you might be surprised how rampant this is. 
We all run from emotions, misunderstand them, bottle them, confuse them, fear them, blame them, hate them, hide from them, disguise them, refuse them, ignore them.  
We just don’t realize it. 
In big ways and small ways. Everyday. 
I am an expert at emotions.  Because of the way I am built, it was a necessity for me to become an expert, and always keep studying. 
It took many many years before I truly started learning to feel safe feeling my anger again. 
I’m still learning, and it’s beautiful. 
The other night I was angry. For no discernible reason. I did the usual things to feel it, allow it, process it, but it came back again and again. So I knew it needed a voice. 
I went for a walk under the full moon and I voiced my anger. All the things, I let anger say how pissed she was about them. 
Under it I saw fear and shame hiding. Anger often comes to protect them (me). 
She’s a well armed bad ass after all. I’m always grateful she’s on my team. 
The next morning I woke up at 5:30 to the giant full moon shining across the ocean and into my window. 
Anger was back. 
So I crawled into pajamas and drove to the ocean. I sat and watched the full moon across the water. Behind me the sun was playing at rising above the clear mountains. 
I sat with my anger and my fear and my shame. 
I cried and I raged. And I shared them so bravely. 
Then I saw the dolphins. They came in close to the shore. They swam back and forth in front of me and jumped and twirled. 
I heard it loud and clear. 
We love you. 
The dolphins, the moon, the sun, the mountains, the ocean, this island.  
They love me. They love me in my humanness,  in my rage that I sometimes feel lonely and needy, in my fear or shame that this means I’m not enough. 
In my bravery and vulnerability in sharing my truth, and standing in it, they love me. 
No matter what I do or who I am they just keep loving me. 
That night, as I danced wildly in Buddhi Yoga, they showed me another truth. And I came all the way back to my empowerment. I came all the way back to loving me in all those ways. 
What is it for you? 
The emotion you don’t feel safe to feel? 
Are you curious to explore the depths of what it has to offer? 
You’re not alone in this. 
I’m here. 
And Anger has my back, and she’s armed to the teeth. 😉 
And at her back are mountains, dolphins, an ocean, a sun and a moon. 
You are not alone. 

Playful Spirituality ~ Can I Reach Enlightenment Through Shoe-Gasm?

I have always had a little aversion to the way spirituality is sometimes portrayed or practiced.
It’s too damn serious!  Guys, I talk to the non-physical daily and I’ll tell you they are anything but humor-less, boring or serious.
And who wants to sit on a mountaintop in silence forsaking high heels, pleasure, laughter, and SEX???
That’s not my bag, baby.
I know in my soul of souls that my life was meant for Living! And that’s what I do, I call it Playful Spirituality and it’s how I live my life.
You see, to me, Enlightenment is Alignment.
Alignment is when you are in sync with the fullness of who you are: your spirit, soul or Higher Self.
Did I lose ya?
How about this; you know when you are in alignment because you feel JOY! Or Passion, or Love, or Wildly Alive, or Giddy Excited!
You can relate to that right?
Well there you go, you have experienced alignment and therefore moments of enlightenment.
BOOM. Well done.
So this is how I live my life, dancing in and out of moments of alignment. Playful Spirituality.
Here is a short list of things that bring me into alignment:
Dancing, laughter, animals, the ocean, sleeping, creating with my hands, making love, sisterhood, sexy shoes or clothes, smiling with a stranger, sunsets, the moon, dragonflies, swinging in a park, redwood trees, nature, meditation, friendship, energy work, painting, singing, twirling, yoga, flowers, …and maybe for you it’s shoes!
Did you notice something? Nowhere in there does it say depriving myself of anything, or punishing myself, or anything serious at all.
Do I have a rich and fulfilling spiritual life? You bet your sweet ass I do. Do I love to chant and am I technically a psychic? Yup. Does that mean I can’t paint my toenails or have wild sex?
Have you been paying attention?
Oh good. In that case I think I made my point.
You can reach enlightenment via shoe-gasm. Or whatever it is that brings you into alignment. Deprive yourself of nothing and feel fulfillment in whatever it is that brings you joy.

Want to learn more about incorporating playful spirituality into your every day life?

Tell me more!

The One And Only Time I Will Tell You To Fake It!

Meditation and Energy Work Hawaii
It happens all the time….
I’m giving a reading to someone and information comes through that blows my mind!
Well this was one of those occasions, so I tried the advice myself and here’s what happened…

This happens to me a lot actually. Information coming through in a reading is so powerful and relevant that I wish more people could hear it!  
Even though the information is directed at the person receiving the reading, I’m learning a ton as it comes to me, and I know anyone listening would too.  
Well, now I have my wish!
A way to share this goodness with more that one person at a time!!  
The Playful Spirit Circle is the culmination of my hearts desire to play with people as I dance along my journey.  
And it’s free for 2 months!
Sign up here and come see what all the giggling is about!
Sign Up Now!

Or, join the Playful Spirit Tribe by signing up below!

Harnessing Your Superpowers!

Meditation and Energy Work Hawaii
I’m excited to share some magic with you today.
Emily Cassel is someone very special to me.
When I met her my heart leapt and I was instantly in love. You know that feeling?  Like “Hey, we’ve been around this block before! We’ve probably gotten in all sorts of trouble together!”
She is a sister to my soul as surely as she gets my dirty, goofball humor. I immediately wanted to keep her.
Recently Emily asked to interview me for her Sisterhood Spotlight Series, I was honored and nervous (it’s true).
She is someone who seriously lights my heart up, as I’m sure you will see.
Her particular Superpower is one I haven’t seen before is such a profound way.
She has the ability to see you in all your greatness, and hold you so steadily there that you cannot help but begin to see it yourself. Sound delectable? Dude. It is.
She is changing lives in a magic-carpet-ride-feels-so-easy-you-don’t-even-realize-you’re-soaring kind of way. Mine included.
She and I are concocting some magic, so expect to see her out here in Hawaii to lead an adventure with me in the new year.
More to come on that…
Enjoy the interview and I can’t wait to hear what you think! (Seriously, I’m curious, excited, nervous, and twitterpated to hear your insights!)

Do you want to learn more about harnessing your superpowers?

Tell me more! 

Or, join the Playful Spirit Tribe by signing up below!


Munchies vs. Masturbation (I can’t believe I’m writing this!)

The other night I had that feeling, the craving feeling.
I wasn’t craving anything specific.
I wasn’t hungry.
I just wanted to be munching on something.  Really wanted to.
I did something different this time.
I stopped, I put my hands on my belly and heart, and I asked my body what is really going on?
I heard right away. “I want to be loved.  Eating snack food is treating my self. and treating myself is loving myself.”
Well shit.
I had a hunch that it had to do with loving my body. I’ve been having a harder time with that than normal lately.  I’m a little heavier and softer than normal.
What was weird was that I had had a day full of self care.
It had been a great day and I had done a few things that made me feel sexy and strong.
But I needed more, obviously.
So I didn’t go for munchies.
I went for my jade egg.
I spent some time enjoying my body.
And you know what?
I didn’t feel fat, and I didn’t feel cravings.
I only felt sensual and turned on, and appreciation for my body that is this incredible vessel for pleasure!
Another win for Stopping and Listening!
I’d love to hear if you have had an experience with stopping and listening lately? Or if you’ve had an experience with the munchies or late night cravings — how did you feed that desire? Comment below!
Big love and lots of self pleasure,

Do you want to learn more about how to stop and listen to yourself?

Tell me more! 

Or, join the Playful Spirit Tribe by signing up below!

Soul Adventure: A One Day Retreat to Reconnect, Restore, & Renew

Meditation and Energy Work Hawaii

Soul Adventure

Soul Adventure:

A One Day Retreat to Reconnect, Restore, & Renew

Recalibrate your Wellness and Worth

You, me, and 11 other inspiring souls will meet for a full day to retreat from our busy lives and settle in to pampering and enjoyment.

This intimate retreat is limited to 12 spots. It will sell out so be sure to secure your spot right away. Reserve your spot here!

We will experience guided meditations, delicious catered snacks and dinner, gentle yoga and movement, the power of coming together in circle, journaling, and a secret surprise!

When: August 9th, 1pm-8pm

Where: Palisades, Kailua-Kona, Hawaii

Price: $137, or sign up with a friend for only $119 each!

If you are ready to learn to take care of yourself as well as you take care of everyone else; ready to see how it feels to put yourself first; ready to experience time for yourself, slowing down, and delicious enjoyment; then join me for Soul Adventure!

I can’t wait to embark on this Soul Adventure with you <3

Get Your Tickets 

A Love Letter to My Money

A Love Letter To My Money
After listening to the Hay House interview with Kate Northrup, who always inspires me so much, I really started thinking about my relationship with money.
Not the in way I always had, but as a relationship just like with a person.
That shift blew my mind and I got the inspiration to write a love letter to my money.  
The experience was so powerful I am sharing it with you!
If you get inspired to write your own letter I’d love to hear how it goes!
Dearest money honey!
I love you! What a teacher you are for me.
Thank you for providing for me, for being the vehicle that brings me many of the things I enjoy.
Thank you for the freedom you give me, the sense of security and safety, for showing me that I can depend on myself and provide for myself.
Thank you for the new lessons you are teaching me about trust, being safe to depend on more than just myself.
Thank you for teaching me so much about flow, energy, trust, abundance, lavish experiences, lack, desire, longing, helplessness, lack of control, power, generosity, freedom, and so much more.
What a rich relationship we have had so far!
Together we have supported people, businesses, and causes.
We have traveled to new exciting places.
We have shown love and appreciation.
We have known delicious comfort, and uncomfortable insecurity.
In me, you have sparked so many new desires and expansions.
You have helped me expand my taste, my understanding of the world, my compassion, and my faith in the universe.
Ahead of us are great things.
I feel it.
We will share our love, encouragement and support with the world.
We will travel and explore, eat the best foods, and bask in the majesty of this world!
We will work and play, and treasure the most fun and brilliant team members!
We will spread the love I have to give and to teach.
Thank you.
I love you.
I am excited for our future together,

Do you want to connect with your higher self?

Tell me more! 

Or, join the Playful Spirit Tribe by signing up below!

How to Choose Freedom ~ A Whale Shark Adventure

How To Choose Freedom
I swam with a whale shark. It was one of the most magical experiences, and one I have dreamed of for years. He was so gentle, so sweet, so calming, so powerful. He spoke to me, I felt him so profoundly, and I feel expanded.
I was a foot from his face looking him in the eye, I was an inch from his fin as he swam past me. I got to swim along with him and witness his magnificent body and his graceful movements.
How To Choose FreedomNot what I ever imagined, growing up as the girl who was terrified of the water and couldn’t swim. 
I was with two dear friends who are professional under water photgraphers, so I knew there would be incredible photos! Thank you to Lisa Denning and Deron Verbeck for bringing such magic to my world!
How To Choose FreedomAt one point I heard in my head “stop and listen” I stopped swimming and let him and the crowd move ahead until I was alone.
I tuned in to him and my whole body flooded with love. I involuntarily wrapped my arms around myself, began crying overflowing tears and heard a few funny whimpering sounds come out of me, and heard the words, “you are SO precious.” He said it twice. “You are SO precious.”
How To Choose Freedom
I felt like he was talking about mankind and me at the same time.
How can you not be changed after something like that???
How To Choose Freedom
The following night Noah and I went to spent the weekend in Volcano, a little town next to (or on top of) our active volcano, Kilauea.
For the first time in many decades the volcano had erupted as a lake of lava!
How to Choose FreedomAs we sat and watched this magnificent site out of the firey boiling lake rose steam and smoke. As I watched it travel from one side of the crater to the other and rise up to the sky I realized shapes were forming. Animal shapes, as if they were rising out of the fire. First dinosaurs, a pterodactyl, then elephants, horse, lion, dog, clear as day I saw them. As if they walked across the lake then drifted to the sky. So many animals, and finally a human shape. It was pure magic! 
How to Choose FreedomWe brought a special offering for the Volcano Goddess Pele. Precious things to me. Orchids from my garden, dark chocolate, sand from cancun, coffee beans and a rare strawberry from our yard, shells from my collection, and a crystal.
Thank you Goddess Pele.
How To Choose FreedomThis weekend has been full of some of the most spiritually fulfilling, rare and precious experiences. Things I never imagined I would do in this lifetime.
It was also counterbalanced with little annoyances. Almost comically so.
On the boat I got extremely seasick. And that nausea came and went for several days, along with painful stomach cramps. Also on the boat I got one of the worst sunburns of my life. So for several days, that hurt like a B!*ch. My skin is still recovering from travel, so I have had huge cystic acne all over my face. Oh and lastly I must’ve strained a muscle in my back because for the last week I’ve been waking up in the morning with my back muscles feeling seized up and sharp pain. Ha!  Can you believe all that?
Put all that together with the magical experience with the whale shark, a beautiful night away with the man of my dreams, and getting to watch Goddess Pele create a lake of lava; and you have quite the dichotomy of experiences!
My point in all this is that I had lots of room for choice.
We always do, in every moment. We have a choice of where we will put our focus.
So I could have focused on the majesty of my experience with the whale shark, or on the burning pain of my sunburn when I move my legs.  On the beautiful house we rented and being with my man, or on waking up with a shooting pain in my back.
And there were definitely times when I did focus on the discomfort. Noah put up with some complaining from me for sure!  More often though, I actively basked in the magic and bliss.
This was a beautiful practice for me to focus.
This is the choice we always have.
Do I focus on what is seemingly wrong or what is gloriously right?
Glass half-full or glass half empty?
In the sisterhood I lead we have been focusing this month on the theme of Freedom. As I reflect on all of these experiences I realize that my biggest Freedom is how I choose to experience this life.
In Love, Cara


Do you want to learn more about how to choose freedom in your own life?

Tell me more! 

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Check Unwanted Energy At the Door!

Meditation and Energy Work Hawaii

Here is a guest blog I did for Sutra Lifestyles with a forward by my friend Maiko. Enjoy!
My friend Cara practically glows from the inside out! She is a beautiful example of a woman who radiates self-love and acceptance. I’m amazed at how she can let negative people or experiences roll off her back and not let it affect her energy or attitude.
At times, difficult situations and people can suck the energy right out of me and I still struggle with keeping that in check. Recently I asked Cara for some tips on how to be engaged in a “situation” without allowing it to leave me exhausted or tense afterward. She gave me this wonderful self-guided meditation practice that has done wonders! I intend to repeat this mantra whenever I start to feel like my energy is being drained or my frustrations are flaring up.
It’s a really good one to practice under your breath when someone who is negative or toxic is in your personal space and there is no quick escape route. I instantly feel lighter and less overwhelmed.
Cara’s instructions and mantra for this meditation are below. Give it a whirl and see what it does for you. Trust me, you’ll love it! Thank you once again Cara for your meditation guidance, love, and positive vibes. For more of Cara’s beautiful affirmations and guidance check out her wonderful post on self-love: I am Beautiful, I am Sexy, I am Strong.
Here’s what Cara has to say:

First and foremost, remember not to judge yourself for taking on other energy! It happens to almost everyone in varying degrees and they don’t even realize it. Maybe you wound up feeling blue after talking to a friend who is depressed and you just can’t seem to shake it off… or you feel angry for no reason at all and you can’t seem to process it and let it go. Often times we are having these feelings and emotions because we have picked up some energy from another person.
This is a great meditation to do each evening, or right after a situation that you feel you took on heavy or unwanted energy.
Find a comfortable seat and get grounded, take several deep breaths and close your eyes. First affirm that you send everyone’s else’s energy back to them with love. Feel it whisking away from your body.
Then imagine you were standing under golden drops of rain, and these drops are washing everything that isn’t yours away, rinsing it all off like a shower.
Repeat these as many times as you need.
Once you are complete take several deep breaths and open your eyes.


Let the light inside you always grow brighter and shine it upon the world.


Time to be brave! Going to tell you my secret. (shhh I’m terrified!)

Meditation and Energy Work Hawaii
Marie Forleo’s B-School is coming up. This is an 8 week business training program that I have wanted to attend for some time. But I have been putting it off with various excuses: I’m not ready, I don’t have time, I can’t afford it, I don’t even know what I want to do with my life!  While those are all true in their own right, the bottom line is: I’m scared.  I’m scared of lots of things!  Scared to fail, scared to put myself out there, scared to spread myself too thin and collapse: scared, scared, scared!
I’m going to tell you something that I stopped telling anyone when I was a young girl.  As long as I can remember I have had this knowing.   This undeniable unarguable knowing that I was going to do or be something big.  That I was destined for something.  I never knew what it was, but as a kid I never worried, the knowing was so strong I never doubted it, or questioned it, or needed to understand it.  I knew I didn’t have to plan it or get it.  It just WAS.  I thought  that “What do you want to be when you grow up?” was such a silly question because I had the knowing.  But people didn’t seem to understand when I would say that ~ and some reacted poorly.  So eventually I stopped saying it.
Along with growing older came learning self doubt and some failures along the way.  I started to doubt the knowing, to question it.  What was it?  Was I crazy?  Was I making it up?  Was I just trying to feel special?  Why wasn’t it coming?  But the knowing held steady, it never changed or went away.  Sometimes I tried to ignore it, I got mad at it, I stuffed it down.  But when I looked it was still there, as strong as ever.  It never pushed me or pulled me or asked anything of me.  It just WAS.
Well, I finally hit some little milestone the other day.  I decided to apply for Marie’s B-School scholarship.  I said to myself  “It’s time to stop hiding this, to stop denying it, to stop playing safe”.  I was exhilarated and terrified.
Two days later Marie released a video about her B-School.  As I was watching it and taking notes she began to talk about how “You have a greatness, a destiny and haven’t you always know that since you were a kid?”  Holy shit I thought, she is talking to me!  Then I thought, no she is talking to Us, that means there are more people who feel this!!  I was dumbfounded. Apparently when you talk about your knowing in elementary school it’s frowned upon, but in Marie’s B-School you’re not a freak you’re: one of the group!  Okay, now I REALLY know I belong in this program!
So, I am at home working on my scholarship video! I have two days to do it including teaching myself how to edit the video!  I’m finishing it up as I type this and it will be posted below.  Fair warning: it’s homemade!  And you can probably hear my head-cold in my voice.   But here it is, it all it’s vulnerable authenticity!  GULP!
Here’s to all of us and our greatness!  Here’s to being brave enough to step into that light even for a second!  Here’s to believing every little kid when they tell us they have a greatness or a knowing!  
I love you,